Sunday, August 12, 2007


Press release just intercepted (and annotated) from the Theatre Royal Newcastle:

The North's favourite panto with 3D bogglevision!

Get ready for the adventure of a lifetime!

Don’t miss our funniest and most spectacular pantomime ever! Featuring sensational special effects, you'll be amazed at some of the most stunning 3D sequences ever created for pantomime, including an incredible Genie! You'll even be able to touch his magic lamp (oooeerrr) as it floats before your eyes in 3D vision!

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Webb & Adams:
On the register.

The North East’s favourite (only?) panto stars, Clive Webb and Danny Adams, return to create more mayhem and more mess with their 'hysterical' routines, including another very messy slapstick scene (think Last Tango in Paris, but with two guys)... and watch out for Danny flying on the most amazing flying carpet you'll ever see with the help of a stolen Methadone prescription!

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Conway: face like a Cod.

Fish lipped (and breathed) Ayr midfielder Craig Conway returns as the villainous Abanazar and the skinny blonde one from Steps that your uncle fancied, Faye Tozer joins in the fun as the magical spirit Scherazade. And making their first ever appearance in pantomime (did they not watch the show in the 80's?), The Daleks, from TV’s Doctor Who, threaten to exterminate Aladdin’s plans (not Aladdin mind, just his plans) to marry Princess Jasmine and live happily ever after…

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Tozer: Spunk bucket.

Aladdin is once again written and directed by Michael Harrison who was responsible for our previous smash hit panto productions of Sinderella, Junior Entertaining Mr. Sloane, Witchfinder General and Jack and the Beanstalk. With an extra week added due to popular demand and tickets selling faster than ever before, be sure to book your seats TODAY for the North East’s favourite (although they've not seen it yet) pantomime!

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Flyer: dubious quality.

Daleks in panto?!!?....what can the Nation estate do next to ruin their image as evil alien dictators next? advertising Kit-Kats, appearing in a movie with the Looney Tunes characters or spunking over each other shouting "White weewee!" in a camp voice?

Oh yeah, they've already done that.

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